I started hosting tea parties in an older home propped as pretty as you please on the corner of a quiet street. A family of four in a two-bedroom, one-bath home made for a tight fit, and tea parties felt downright snug, but no one would change a thing. Some teas were scripture-based, and others celebrated holidays, but every time, the room filled with the scent of scones, floral tea, and laughter.
In December 2007, I paused hosting after losing my maternal grandmother, one of the most influential women in my life. The desire fizzled until we moved to the Foothills of South Carolina. Maybe it was the mountain air, the silence that comes with country living, or a whisper from the Lord saying it’s time again.
I took these Valentine’s Tea pictures at the first tea in the mountains, an intimate gathering with writerly friends. The call to write for the Lord introduced us, but honing our skills together, leaning on each other during the disappointments, and cheering on the victories cultivated relationships written for eternity.
Marcia Moston, Carol Roper, and Beth Saadati
They say a picture is worth a thousand words. I hope this is true, as I have more pictures than words today.
Initially, I plucked a neatly wrapped bunch of non-Valentine flowers from one of the grocery store floral buckets. They were pretty enough and saved a few pennies. But after spotting these tri-colored roses, I plunged the non-Valentine bunch back into their bucket and never looked back.
A favorite tea treat is a yogurt, vanilla-almond granola, and fruit in half-pint jars. My paternal grandmother passed down the vintage Apple Blossom tea cups and saucers you see above.
What better way to wish a group of writers a happy Valentine’s Day than by spelling it out? This idea works with any tea theme!
As a recovering perfectionist, I remind myself that the joy in gathering with friends, regardless of whether there are two or twenty around the table, isn’t discovered in perfectly set tables, dust-free surfaces, the most favorable food, or the perfect centerpiece but in the mingling of hearts and souls for God’s glory.
“You can never get a cup of tea large enough or a book long enough to suit me.” – C.S. Lewis
Or too many reasons to celebrate with friends. – Cathy Baker
It will be a different holiday season. On that, we can agree.
No need to run down all the reasons why. We’re very much aware of each one, but Thanksgiving and Christmas will come nonetheless.
Neither set of my parents, nor my aunt and uncle, will gather around our farm table this Thanksgiving. Who will crack the corny jokes, or whip up the family dressing, or clap for the grandkids when they perform from the top step?
As we navigate the holiday seasons of 2020 together, maybe one of the following ideas can ease the disappointment and help make way for gratitude.
7 Ideas for Cultivating a Spirit of Togetherness This Holiday Season
Choose joy. Lately, we’ve been talking to our grandkids about the half-full or half-empty scenario. Now I need to talk to myself. Yes, the holiday season will likely look and feel different. But, who will be around our table? Will it be a spouse, sons and daughters, a pup or cat that feels like family, or the warm presence of the Lord? We can choose joy over disappointment.
Do those missing from your dinner table live nearby? Fill up plates with turkey and all the fixins’. Don’t skimp on the pie! Deliver with a smile and a holiday-sized air hug.
Plan a Facetime or Zoom session ahead of time. It will give everyone something to look forward to.
Donate. Give the money usually spent on additional groceries to feed those in need of a hot meal that day. (Bonus: Donate it in honor of those missing from your holiday table.)
Create a table runner. Ask children and/or grandchildren to draw pictures and write positive messages on a Kraft paper table runner, as seen here at Hobby Lobby. Drop it in the mail by November 19th, or drop it by their home. Loved ones will surely feel your presence as they enjoy their meals.
Create a “Why We Love You Jar”. Much like the “Gratitude Jar” recently shared in our Facebook Group, “Creative Pauses”, simply write the different reasons why you love a person (or couple) on slips of paper. Cut, place in a jar, and add directions asking her to choose one slip to read aloud each day beginning on Thanksgiving, and ending Christmas morning. Is there a better gift than knowing we are loved? (If your loved one lives out of town, mail the slips only.)
Will there be empty chairs around your holiday table this year? How will you choose to cultivate a spirit of joy and togetherness despite the disappointment?
Thank you for stopping by Creative Pauses from The Tiny House on the Hill!
Bi-weekly posts invite you to come in from the craziness of life, take a seat, and pause awhile, allowing your soul to be refreshed with God’s truth and promises.
Each month, subscribers of this community receive a letter from The Tiny House on the Hill that includes:
Practical but meaningful ways to draw closer to God
Creative ways to show God’s love to your family, friends, and strangers
The latest happenings at the house, my books, and ministry
What I’m reading in the Book Nook
A favorite (often family) recipe
A FUN giveaway…and more!
It’s pithy but packed with grace-filled goodness.
So, come on over and sit a spell. I’d love to get to know you!
This kind of encounter with God drops me to my knees.
It was an ordinary day of packing up my laptop, cords, books, banana, and water before heading up the hill to write. At the last minute, I squeezed in my sketchbook. It’s heavy and cumbersome, two reasons that make it a rare haul.
I climbed the hill, spread out my goods on the desk, and prayed. Lifting up our community here on the blog is nothing new, but over the past few weeks, I’ve also prayed for our NEW Facebook Group, Creative Pauses. It’s a newborn babe and I feel like a first-time mother.
But something more was stirring.
I opened the sketchbook and laid it flat with bright white (and blank) pages facing up. I didn’t want to form a Facebook Group just for the purpose of saying I have one or for polishing up a book proposal.
If life has taught me anything it’s that authentic community is a rare and treasured gift.
And this is when God moved in such a way that all I could do was hang on for dear life. In rapid-fire delivery, specific images along with words, sentences, and paragraphs targeted my sketchbook.
It began with a campfire.
So I drew one in the center of my page, and these words quickly followed:
I imagine a campfire with roaring flames in the middle of a wide-open field.
The field is surrounded by homes of all sizes and shapes. Inside, are imperfect people from all stages of life who love, create, wrestle with sin, offer grace, homeschool, and worship. They are our homes.
One-by-one we make our way toward the campfire blazing in the distance.
Moving closer, we hear crackle! and pop! from well-seasoned wood and catch the indelible scent of smoke flowing through the field. Eventually, we all move close enough to notice benches and blankets placed around the fire. Picnic baskets overflowing with the finest of foods fill in the spaces.
We didn’t gather the wood.
We didn’t split the kindling or light the fire.
We didn’t prepare the food or pour the Chick-fil-A tea.
God prepared it for us.
A place for us to come and gather around the campfire to share our stories, to tell of His goodness, to marvel at His handiwork, and to consider His great love for us.
“Whoever is wise, let him heed these things and consider the great love of the LORD.” Psalm 107:43 NIV
When we intentionally choose to step away from our to-do’s to pause and reflect on the goodness of our God⏤and receive it⏤we cultivate a life of continuous worship.
The kind of life God uses to help heal relationships, bring change to communities, and impact the future generations we will never know.
When we get up and return to our homes surrounding the field, we continue to feel the warmth on our backs.
And our clothes still carry the holy and exquisite scent of biblical community.
I fully believe this “download” was for us⏤for this community of believers who believe there’s more to the Christian life than checking off a list of scriptures read, and a prayer prayed while scurrying out the door. Both are valuable, but we are confident that one of the many benefits of being His is being able to meet with Him⏤to listen, and to receive. As Lysa TerKeurst says in her book, “Made to Crave”:
We were made for more.
And this is why I created our Facebook Group, Creative Pauses. It’s simply an extension of the community we share here. But there, we can all join in the conversation. By joining the group, you will also have access to helpful downloads, fun giveaways, and special events like this one coming up on September 17th:
Do you feel the warmth of God’s presence in this place? Here are two ways to move toward the campfire:
Simply type your e-mail address in the sidebar (just below “Coloring Pages” with the bird in flight) to subscribe to the blog. I post every other week and you’ll also receive a monthly letter. You can unsubscribe at any time.
Gathering each week to worship the One true God is life-giving.
Gathering with the One, quiet and alone, is a sacred delight.
This gathering requires no preparations. Simply come.
Sometimes, especially after a hard season in life, or in the middle of one, I find comfort in setting an intentional table for two. This tea time with God isn’t a weird “fluffy feel good” practice. It’s an intentional act that flies in the face of my enemy who never tires of reminding me of past sins or current failures.
But God’s nearness is the key that unlocks both my hope and joy. So I simply come.
Two teacups sit on my farm table. One cup holds a teabag. The other holds a place at the table, reminding me that my Heavenly Father’s presence is that near.
As the kettle whistles and the water pours, my cup blossoms into rich amber. Its rising fragrance reminds me of the incense that arose from the Holy of Holies, representing the prayers of God’s people.
Let my prayer be accepted as sweet-smelling incense in your presence. Psalm 141:2
As I sip my tea — time slows to a sacred pace. I sit still and quiet.
Be still and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10
There’s nothing natural about stilling the heart and mind. (Lately, it seems the more unnatural/uncomfortable something feels, the more convinced I am it is of God.) He wants us to know Him. I can’t wrap my head around this truth but I fully embrace it with every drop of gratitude possible.
Let these truths settle deep in the soul: God never hides from us, ignores our pain, or fiddles with a phone when we speak. Nothing is too small, too big, too high, or too wide for His reach. He is ever-present.
May these truths never wear thin in the fabric of our everyday lives.
As I sip my tea, I read His Word aloud, pray, and talk with Him as I would with a friend sitting across from me. Words aren’t always necessary, just like any relationship. “Happy masks” are exchanged for the freedom that is mine through Jesus. In Him, I can be me — a repeat offender, quirky, and quite the mess, but it’s in this same freedom I recognize that “being me” doesn’t negate my sinfulness. In fact, it highlights it, and for my good. So I confess and close out our time by thanking God for who He is:
Heavenly Father
Holy
Just
Forgiving, full of grace
Omniscient
Omnipresent
El Roi, the God who sees
The quiet power of our tea-for-two lingers long after the last sip, thanks be to Jesus.
Have you practiced something similar? Is there a particular name of God you’re leaning into these days? I’d love for you to share your thoughts with us in the comment section.
NEW Gift for Subscribers to the Creative Pauses Community
I hope you enjoy these five fun scripture-based coloring pages!
If you’d like to become a part of the community, simply type your e-address in the righthand sidebar. >>>> Bi-weekly posts offer a pause of goodness to your busy days, and once a month, you’ll also receive a newsletter chock-full of the latest happenings in the Tiny House on the Hill, along with ideas on ways we can draw near to God and love others well. So, come on over and sit a spell. I’d love to get to know you!
“Our generation needs women like you to pour into us.”
These words, from the lips of an eighteen-year-old woman, continue to flow through my mind as smoothly as the coffee tasted that morning.
Several weeks following my cafe encounter, Brian and I hosted our first small group from our new church. We were told ahead of time that the majority of the group consisted of college students.
I felt a rush of excitement over the opportunity to meet these young women but it didn’t take long for insecurities to rise and take their place. You didn’t attend college, so what could you possibly offer these young women? Why would they care what you have to say? Why are you in this group anyway?
All this while trying to rescue a dozen chocolate chip cookies from our gas-fired oven. But before they had time to cool, the college students, mostly female, began filing through our back door, two-by-two.
And I did what any good southerner would do—I hugged the puddin’ out of them.
We ate, drank hot tea, laughed, shared, studied and prayed that night. My insecurities fell like scales from my eyes. Like Saul, I was able to see—really see. The connection between “the girls” and I had nothing to do with me, my strengths, and especially my weaknesses.
I put my insecurities back in their place⏤at the foot of the cross.
It’s not about what I have or don’t have to offer. It’s about what God has to offer through me.
A few weeks after our first meeting, I asked the girls if they might be interested in coming over for a little tea party. “Will there be sugar cubes?” one asked. Why oh my, yes!
Because Valentine’s Day was right around the corner, it soon evolved into a bona fide Valentine’s Day Tea Party.
Because I was expecting twelve and my great-aunt’s Apple Blossom china plates only counted to eight, I ordered a stack of ornately trimmed plates decked out in peachy-pink from Amazon. They come in an array of gorgeous colors and they were the perfect fit for both the table and my budget.
The love of my great-aunt, who purchased a piece of this china with every paycheck, was present through the use of these treasured teacups and saucers. (Did I mention she purchased these pieces for me even though I was a baby at the time?)
I found these individual cupcake holders in the Target dollar bin, along with the larger pedestal platter that held vanilla doozies wrapped in sprinkles. On each pedestal, a light pink gauzy ribbon was attached, even though they’re barely visible in the picture.
After we munched on scones and sandwiches between sips of tea, I passed around this heart-shaped basket. Inside were hearts, one side gold, and the other paper, with a handwritten verse about God’s love.
We closed out our evening together by taking turns lighting hand-held candles. After each candle caught flame, the gold heart was flipped over and the verse was read aloud. It was a sweet time of worship.
My girls. Beautiful, inside and out.
Before leaving, they picked up this little bag filled with a Starbucks gift card, colorful gumballs individually wrapped, and chocolate kisses dressed in Valentine colors.
Looking back, I believe God began preparing my heart that morning in the North Carolina cafe. I could’ve never known that within a few months, the road would lead to my celebrating God’s love with a group of young women who’ve stolen my heart.
Like all stories penned by God, beauty unravels at every turn.
Is there some area in life where you’re holding back because of your insecurities? I’d love to pray for you. Private message, email, or leave your request in the comment section.
Which part of the tea party is your favorite? Do share!
We have a sheltering tree. Its double-trunk supports wide-sprawling branches, offering respite on these sweltering days in the South.
Friends are like that, too.
When we feel we’re being bombarded by the unexpected, wayward children, or a million little things⎯all at once⎯we find comfort in a friend’s touch.
When we fall into the trap of comparing ourselves to thinner, prettier, more successful, Mary-like women, our friends are there to pull us out of the muck and speak truth into our lives.
So, last week, three friends came over for lunch. There was no agenda other than to catch up, encourage one another, and offer respite through lots of laughter, good food, and raspberry lemonade.
Friendships⎯like trees⎯grow, mature, and blossom in a variety of ways.
For instance, when I think of Edie, the Lily-of-the-Valley tree, better known as Sourwood, comes to mind. This tree offers beauty in all seasons. In Spring, white fragrant pearly clusters of flowers bloom profusely. In Autumn, its red leaves gloss over like shiny waxed apples. Regardless of the season of life, she finds herself in⎯joyous or downright tough⎯Edie exudes Christ. But there’s one particular characteristic about the Sourwood tree that reminds me of her. This tree is a tremendous source of nectar for bees to produce honey. Over the last 9 years, I’ve seen her selflessly pour herself, her gifts, prayers, and talents into other writers, such as myself. As God brings her own hard work to fruition, the work of countless others who have drawn wisdom and insight from her help also bring Him glory. And then they, in turn, help other writers, creating a beautiful circle of life.
Vonda’s qualities, although too many to mention (truly!) remind me of a well-loved evergreen tree called the Southern Wax Myrtle. Like the Sourwood, it too puts on a show year-round with its lustrous green leaves in the summer months and bluish gray clusters of berries in the winter. The leaves release a very aromatic scent when crushed, that smell much like a bay berry candle. Although you don’t hear Vonda complain, she sometimes carries a heavy load behind-the-scenes. But like the Myrtle tree, when she is at her weakest, “crushed” beneath the weight, there is a sweet aroma released from her soul. It’s not the fragrance of bay berry, but that of Christ. And like the Sourwood, the Wax Myrtle tree also supplies nectar for the bees. God has used both Edie and Vonda to bless a multitude of writers over the years. {Thank you!}
And then there’s Pea, aka, Dee Dee Parker. She’s my Weeping Willow tree. Her sickness earlier this year had me shedding many prayerful tears but thankfully they’re now induced by laughter. Much laughter. One interesting fact about the Weeping Willow tree is that it’s often planted by streams so that their braid-like roots will protect the bank from erosion. In the same way, Dee Dee’s prayers are woven throughout her day as she too seeks a water Source⎯Jesus. He is the only One who can ultimately refresh, restore, and renew those she lifts in prayer.
All three friends touch my life and the lives of many others in ways they’ll only know once they reach heaven.
I could learn a thing or two from these women when it comes to being a sheltering tree for others. This hasn’t exactly been a banner year for me in that department. Partly because of the new distance between me and most of my friends back in our old hometown. And in all honesty, the struggle to discover the balance for needing long stretches of writing time and life in general, is real.
But isn’t that what sheltering trees are all about? When struggles, storms, and hard situations enter our lives, we know we can find refuge beneath their branches. It is there we also find refreshment.
A sweet friendship refreshes the soul. Proverbs 27:9
Leigh Ann Thomas is a friend whose gentle spirit and tenacious love for Christ is evident in her life as well as her words. Her recent release, “Ribbons, Lace, and Moments of Grace…Inspiration for the Mother of the Bride” is no exception. I wish her book would’ve been available when our boys were getting married. Mothers of the Groom need a little inspiration (and a lot of coffee) too!
Today, I’m giving away a copy of Leigh Ann’s beautiful book to one blessed reader. If you are a mother of a bride {or groom} prepare to be inspired. If you know someone else in this role, inspire away by purchasing a copy for them. I can’t imagine a better gift.
Enter the drawing by simply answering the question below. I’ll randomly select a name next Tuesday!
How has a friend touched you⎯refreshing your soul⎯in recent days?
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