Can we start a “How to Live an Unhurried Life” support group?
I’d be the first to sign up. You see, I’m not writing this post from an “I got this!” point of view. I simply want to learn how to squash the word “hurry” from my life and replace it with “holy”.
After all, our greatest example in living an unhurried but holy life is Jesus. Just ask Martha and Mary.
Now a man named Lazarus was sick. He was from Bethany, the village of Mary, and her sister Martha.(This Mary, whose brother Lazarus now lay sick, was the same one who poured perfume on the Lord and wiped his feet with her hair.)So the sisters sent word to Jesus, “Lord, the one you love is sick.”
When he heard this, Jesus said, “This sickness will not end in death. No, it is for God’s glory so that God’s Son may be glorified through it.”Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus.So when he heard that Lazarus was sick, he stayed where he was two more days,and then he said to his disciples, “Let us go back to Judea.” (John 11:1-7)
“So when he heard that Lazarus was sick, he stayed where he was two more days.”
By the time Jesus arrived, John tells us that Lazarus had been in the tomb for four days. We all know how this story ends. But where does our story begin as we think about Jesus’ view of priorities, time, and schedule?
Yes, Jesus is God but the Holy Spirit resides within us, equipping us to choose an unhurried life.
Around our house, summertime is by far the most hurried. For Brian, there’s mowing almost four acres, keeping the pool from becoming an acid pit, and trimming shrubs that block swimmer’s views of the mountains. My summer pool hurry is more about shuffling around like crazy at the last minute trying to shove books, papers, a rogue power cord that stretches across the room, and anything else that our two and three-year-old grandchildren might find interesting, into a nearby bedroom. I know it’s not pretty, but it’s real.
Feeling the constant tug of hurry this summer, I put some practical grace-paced “to-do’s” into place that will last long after the final swim:
On Sunday nights, I take a few minutes to jot down meal ideas for the week, along with the needed ingredients. This helps to eliminate questions about dinner plans and the hurried feeling that ensues.
Also on Sunday nights, I look at my calendar and choose 2-3 top priorities for the week. I try to keep them in order: God, family, church, and ministry. No doubt, I sometimes fall flat, but I try to be intentional about it. Intentionality offers focus, which for me, offers peace in knowing I don’t have to accomplish it all (as if I could!).
No writing or creating on Sundays, giving the soul, body, and mind a rest.
Before bed, I make sure the square frying pan is readied for eggs and the tiny measuring cup is washed and prepped for coffee creamer. To most, it’s called a routine. To me it’s a gift, knowing the next morning starts with a clean slate, no pun intended.
I pray to remain open to His plans and “interruptions” for the day. I’m prone to zero in on a project and not raise my head for hours at a time. Trusting He will provide when plans change helps to eliminate the feeling of hurry or anxiousness.
Simple, right? Some of our most life-giving moments begin with small, doable steps.
Consider small steps you might put into place this week to help lessen the hurry as you move through your days with purpose and joy.
“Hurry is not just a disordered schedule. Hurry is a disordered heart.”
“I feel hurried inside even when nothing actually urgent is on my schedule. Hurry has become a habit: I find myself stuck in emergency mode.”
“I realize that an unhurried life is not a lazy life. In fact, it can be the exact opposite. Jesus was unhurried, but he was not lazy He was engaged, hardworking, purposeful, and conscientious.”
“I’m aware that God’s great commandment to us isn’t ‘Get more things done,’ but to love him with the whole of our energies, capacities, and passions to extend that love to others. And love isn’t rushed.”
“God is never in a hurry.”
“Being unhurried does not mean being unresponsive to divine nudges. Being unhurried enables us to notice those nudges and to respond.”
“I don’t think I’ll find my deepest joy in the number of people who liked something I said or did. I’m coming to believe that my greatest joy will be being part of an extended community of men and women with whom I’ve shared a journey with Jesus, living out his life in our families, our neighborhoods, our workplaces and schools, and the church communities where God has planted us.”
“Despite Jesus’ example, I find it a continual temptation to do things that will get a lot of people excited about what I’m doing⎯and get them excited now!”
“Do our conversations about ministry revolve around growing numbers of participants, successful programs, or other easily measured outcomes? Or do we tell stories about particular people who are responding to Jesus, stories of seeds of gospel truth sown in people’s hearts that will grow into the fruit of Christlikeness?”
Told to John Ortberg during a transition in his ministry life: “You must ruthlessly eliminate hurry from your life.”
Now that’s a lot of unhurried goodness. How are you eliminating hurry from your life? Do tell!
Not just any ice cream, mind you. It must include sweet morsels of cookie dough, thin mints, or chocolate chips⏤sprinkles, syrups, or anything fruity are simply not invited to the party.
Recently, while wiping minty green deliciousness from around my lips, the words Where is your self-control? rudely interrupted the moment. The words stunned me even more than the fact that I was returning a half-eaten pint of my favorite meal snack to the freezer.
We know when it’s time for a change. And this was that moment.
Scenes from the last two years darted past.
Let’s see. There was the stress of prepping our old house to sell, then the move, writing two books in one year, the heartbreak of returning a beloved puppy on Valentines Day, and struggling with a couple of ongoing medical issues that wiggled fingers from their ears, double-dog-daring me to just try and lose the weight.
Hmm…turns out, it wasn’t ice cream I tasted. It was my emotions. If only they were fat-free. *sigh*
Convinced I couldn’t gain control of my eating habits, or the expanding waistline, I gave up. I grew comfortable buying one larger size after the other, but way down deep, I knew my lack of self-control was costing a lot more than 4.99 a gallon.
So I whipped out my favorite sketchbook, turned it sideways, and drew a line down the center of the page. Each column claimed a title.
The left column: Results From Eating Poorly. Keeping it real here, folks:
Avoiding people I haven’t seen since the added weight.
I’m not reflecting the power of self-discipline.
Feeling dumpy.
Slave to sweets.
I run away from the camera and videos.
The right column: Benefits from Eating Healthier
Live unashamed!
Healthier body, mind, and spirit.
Attention and energy will shift more to others (instead of worrying about what people think about me.)
I won’t shy away from the camera, whether it’s snapping shots with my family, fun selfies with friends, or video opportunities.
This time next year, I will be healthier, stronger, and more energetic. (One of the reasons we moved closer to the mountains was for the convenience of kayaking and hiking.)
There I sat, comparing the two columns and circling key words, like avoid, slave to sweets, not reflecting⏤followed by⏤live, unashamed, won’t shy away.
For the first time in two years, I saw my life choices for what they really were, as well as their cost. Two scripture verses quickly followed:
You say, “I am allowed to do anything”—but not everything is good for you. And even though “I am allowed to do anything,” I must not become a slave to anything.1 Corinthians 6:12
[Truth is, I had given food way too much control over my life. It was my comforter, my be-happy-for-ten-minutes drug, my thoughtless activity. I want my life to reflect what I believe, not what brings me relief.]
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,gentleness, and self-control. Galatians 6:22, 23 NIV
[I agreed with the voice that had rudely interrupted me only minutes prior, saying aloud, You’re right! I have no self-control. God said, “Wrong! I have given you everything you need to exercise self-control. My power lives in you. Depend on Him, not yourself.”]
I prayed for help, wisdom, and a desire to eat healthier.
I came up with a simple plan to focus mainly on my eating habits. If I tried too much at one time, I would be overwhelmed. I re-started Weight Watchers, looked back at this post in 2015 for tips, and instead of finding ways it wouldn’t work for me, I found a way to make it work. Now I make a weekly menu and stock my fridge with all the right things (I use my extra points on the weekend for a cupcake — and I enjoy every bite!)
I dedicated the plan to God with open and outstretched hands, confessing I can’t do it without Him.
So why am I sharing this journey with you at ten pounds down instead of waiting for a whopping victorious number?
Because it’s the small, strong, day-to-day choices we make that are to be celebrated.
It’s not about arriving at a certain number on a scale, or making “x” amount of money, or gaining “x” amount of social media followers.
It’s about arriving at the feet of Jesus.
Is there a situation in your life that might benefit by drawing a line down the center of a page?
My husband gave me a soft nubby-textured shawl for my birthday. But it wasn’t just any shawl. It was a Giving Shawl.
I recently spotted it in a local gift shop but didn’t pay too much attention to its name. So when I released the soft ribbon surrounding the shawl to find a label with the words Giving Shawl sewn onto the pocket, I was torn.
I loved everything about it but felt an odd sort of guilt for wanting to keep it. After all, the shawl was created to be given away.
In the same pocket was a cloth bookmark with these words:
“We all need a little comfort now and then…A reminder to help us know that we are not alone in the world…That there is someone in our corner, ready with a hug, no matter what. Always know you are being thought of, cheered on, And loved for exactly who you are⏤Someone who is beautifully and wonderfully made.”
It was the last line that left a lump in my throat.
You see, this year I’ve gained more than two books on the Amazon shelf. I’ve also gained weight and a lot of it. I shun the camera and scold Brian for posting my picture (unless it’s pre-2016) on his Facebook page. The mirror is my foe, not my friend. I avoid seeing people who knew me before the shift in weight, imagining the words they must be thinking when they see me.
Maybe I was, in fact, the intended recipient after all.
The Giving Shawl lay bare my desire to offer grace to others but receive it at sloth-like speed for myself.
Growing up, weight was a dirty word on my dad’s side of the family. The recordings to stay a particular size for everyone’s benefit have played in the background of my mind for most of my life. So while this post isn’t written from a place of victory (yet!) it is written from a place of desire. A desire not only for myself but also for my granddaughters because the way we view ourselves affects those in our sphere of influence whether we realize it or not. , I now see the need to pray with the same fervency that a Christ-centered cycle of healthy self-acceptance begins with me.
So, as I drape this Giving Shawl around my shoulders, I will remember:
The only weight that defines my worth is the weight of my sin Jesus bore on the cross.
My heavenly Father, husband, family, and friends love me unconditionally.
Just as I pray to see others as Christ sees them, I can embrace this desire for myself as well.
Acknowledging the need to take better care of myself physically is a gift from the Lord.
Even so, if the scale never budges, I will still be the apple of my Father’s eye. (Psalm 17:8)
After an 8 week recoup time last November, I’d planned to hop back on the Weight Watchers wagon without missing a beat. And then Oprah and her bread-eating self entered the picture and everything changed. The plan (PointsPlus™) I credit for helping me lose 30 pounds last year switched over to SmartPoints™.
Flexibility is one of the main reasons I chose Weight Watchers last year, and now there is very little of that, especially for those of us with a sweet tooth. {Despite my sugar allowances, I passed every health requirement for insurance with flying colors⎯the first time in years.}
Having choices on the PointsPlus™ plan also helped me to not feel deprived. I’m concerned many will end up feeling exactly that on the new plan, but we all have our choices to make, and with those choices, changes. My change included cancelling my membership. I’m sticking with the PointsPlus™ plan using my old calculator. Yes, I miss not being able to access online tools but it’s worth the sacrifice. I know what works for me, and even though it’s harder to stay on track without the support of the Weight Watchers leaders (whom I love by the way!), I’m determined to try.
So, while change is often a good thing, this one doesn’t feel like it. I’m disappointed, a little timid about going it alone, and a tad frustrated that the company had to go and change what was working for many people.
Graphic courtesy of PictureGraphics
I hope the new program will be the right direction for many. I really do.
How about you? Has anything changed in your life lately as a result of choices made by others? Hopefully, it’s a good change! Please share in the comment section.
1. It’s not exactly a snippet.
2. It is, however, something I sense God wants me to share.
3. His promptings trump my plans.
H-E-A-L-T-H-Y
Before I jump in, you need to know that in 2012 I was enrolled in Weight Watchers, as I am now, but the results were much different. It took me six months to lose ten pounds. Here’s the difference:
My motivation. After gall bladder surgery in March my awesome hubby waited on me hand and foot. While a blessing, his willingness to care for me awakened me to the fact that if I kept going in the same direction on the scale, he would one day be taking care of me on a whole other level due to poor health. Another reason? I don’t want to “burden” my children in the future simply because I refuse to take better care of myself today.
Some things we have no control over
but the choices we can make today will determine the choices made for us in the future.
With that, here are some simple strategies that have evolved — and continue to evolve — as a Weight Watchers member. Even if you’re not enrolled in WW, I hope something will spark your interest. Remember, these are choices I’ve made based on my preferences. You’ll have your own. 🙂 And by the way, I have a long way to go. I’ve not arrived. I will fail at times but I’m in it for the long haul and these tips would’ve helped me stay on track in 2012, so here goes.
1. Count every single point. This also holds true if you’re counting carbs or calories. In 2012, I didn’t count the strawberry jam on my toast because, well, jam naturally goes with toast! #Fail.
2. Using my bonus points, I choose one special thing to eat/drink on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. I try to leave at least 15 bonus points available for the week. This way, I’m able to work in my favorite Panera breakfast sandwich (replacing the egg with egg whites), my fancy froo-froo frappucino (I ask them to hold the whip cream but to put on a dome lid so that when I get home, I can fill it with my fat free whip) and last but not least, pumpkin bread from Starbucks on Sunday. There’s no deprivation here, my friends.
3. I make sure everything I use to cook breakfast (egg whites, grits, coffee) are clean the night before. This way, I’m not tempted to eat anything else. You’d be surprised how a dirty spatula can leave you aching for a gravy biscuit.
4. Keep healthy ingredients on hand as well as specific ingredients needed for your meals. I bake all my chicken for the week at once, weigh out 1.5 oz, and put that amount in individual freezer bags to pull out as needed for salads.
5. I’m learning to replace one high point food with a low one. I love sweets! I’ve found a WW candy that I find very satisfying for only 1 point. Sure beats a bag of 7 point M and M’s.
6. When recently meeting friends at a Mexican restaurant I decided ahead of time that if I left the restaurant without having eaten chips and salsa I would feel very deprived. I wouldn’t, however, feel deprived by leaving tacos in my wake so I ate a 3 point meal just before leaving the house and polished off my meal at the restaurant with a dozen chips and salsa for 4 points. Major score!
7. Combine breakfast and lunch points for something special. Eating a banana or other fruit earlier in the morning can make this a reality.
8. Before I go out to eat, I check the WW site to determine my options.
9. I bought a Fitbit with a heart-rate monitor and love it! Talk about motivation.
10. Going through several tests for my gall bladder issues in March helped me to realize that it was perfectly okay to go to bed with a growling tummy. Really, it is.
11. When we go to the movies (normally on a weekend) I plan to have my special treat (see #2) AFTER the movie. It gives me something to look forward to and I don’t succumb to the 30+ points the movie popcorn has to offer. #applydirectlytothehips
12. Accountability. I can’t stress this one enough. In all honesty, there were only two reasons why I re-joined Weight Watchers meetings: My best friend of 20+ years kept inviting me (at Summit Church we refer to this as being lovingly intrusive) and Michelin had a great deal to offer. But now as I look back I’m convinced the accountability has made all the difference.
13. Find an exercise that feels more like fun than torture. For me, it’s Jazzercise. I especially appreciate the fact there’s not an expansive glass wall putting me on display. #andsimpsonvilleheavesacollectivesighofrelief
Again, I’m not saying I’ve got it all under control — far from it — but for the first time in my life, I see the tremendous impact a handful of simple strategies can make in a person’s life. I want to encourage you as I encourage myself.
If you like the ideas above I can continue sharing them as I put them into practice but above all, I’d love to learn from YOU!
Please share any strategies you’ve learned along the way. To God be the glory.
Cathy Baker
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Having choices on the PointsPlus™ plan also helped me to not feel deprived. I’m concerned many will end up feeling exactly that on the new plan, but we all have our choices to make, and with those choices, changes. My change included cancelling my membership. I’m sticking with the PointsPlus™ plan using my old calculator. Yes, I miss not being able to access online tools but it’s worth the sacrifice. I know what works for me, and even though it’s harder to stay on track without the support of the Weight Watchers leaders (whom I love by the way!), I’m determined to try.
